


meandering to distraction

by obstinateRixatrix



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-14
Updated: 2019-02-14
Packaged: 2019-10-28 15:08:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17789681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/obstinateRixatrix/pseuds/obstinateRixatrix
Summary: Yusuke talks about when he started liking Ryuji (in the boyfriend way).





	meandering to distraction

**Author's Note:**

> [a pal drew me foxskull ](https://twitter.com/KittanZero/status/1095913341451714560) so even though this wasn't written specifically as a gift, I Dedicate This To You, Pita.
> 
> thanks liz for the once-over!

The transition from friends to lovers is a rather awkward one. Of course, Yusuke anticipated an adjustment period of sorts, but the effect it has on Ryuji is truly fascinating as he alternates between shy and shameless at odd intervals. There are moments where Ryuji acts uncharacteristically self-conscious of proximity, hesitant in ways that belie their level of familiarity— a distance absent until the emergence of romantic reciprocation. Then, there are moments where Ryuji barges into Yusuke’s dorm, draping himself over Yusuke and filling the air with idle chatter in an obvious bid for attention. In short, being a nuisance.

(Though, not an unwelcome one.)

At this point it’s essentially a stubborn contest of will. The still-life sketch due tomorrow isn’t particularly challenging, nor is it inspiring, but he continues to give it a fair amount of attention in spite of Ryuji’s attempts to be as much of an inconvenience as possible.

Yusuke’s relatively certain he’s winning, perfectly capable of multitasking through art and the light conversation of Ryuji’s stream of consciousness: it certainly was unreasonable for Ann to brazenly swipe a portion of his lunch; actually, he should probably listen to Makoto’s advice in regards to his study habits; when it comes to broth, salt-based is clearly superior; it would be nice to visit Leblanc after finishing this assignment; and so on. Then Ryuji asks, “So, when _did_ you start liking me?”

“When did I start liking you?” Yusuke echoes.

“In the boyfriend way,” he clarifies, arms encircling Yusuke in a loose embrace, chin resting on his shoulder.

Alas, it’s Yusuke’s loss; though a seemingly flippant question, it’s one that requires his full consideration, and he places the remnants of his charcoal nib onto the easel as he thinks.

“I believe it was when we designed our first calling card together,” he says, eventually.

Ryuji stares for a moment, looking rather shocked. “That far back? You totally hated me, though!”

“I never hated you,” Yusuke protests, “I merely...” Well, he was far too mired in unfortunate judgements and self-absorption to pay Ryuji any mind.

“Yeah, alright,” Ryuji concedes, waving past grievances aside, “but there's _no way_ you had a crush on me back then.”

“I didn’t.”

“Huh?”

“Though I didn’t realize at the time, it was a formative moment,” Yusuke explains. “Our collaboration planted a seed of interest that would gradually bloom into affection.”

“Poetic.” Ryuji rolls his eyes, an overt dismissal of Yusuke’s description— certainly unwarranted, as it wasn’t so terribly florid— but the faint smile that tugs at his lips is transparently fond. “That doesn’t really answer my question. Or, I guess it kind of does, but you’ve gotta give me the details!”

“You apologized to me.”

“What? Huh? Why?” Ryuji asks, alarmed “What did I do?”

It’s somewhat amusing, seeing how easily flustered he is. Really though, he shouldn’t be so quick to assume the worst of himself. “You apologized for writing the calling card,” Yusuke explains.

Ryuji’s blank expression shifts into dawning recollection. “Oh yeah, I kind of remember that.”

Until that point, it had been easy to interpret Ryuji’s enthusiasm as related to the high status of their target. Excitement for the job, perhaps. But then… seeing him so adamant that Yusuke deserved to express his feelings directly to his oppressor, so fixated on what Yusuke ostensibly had a right to...

“I realized the depths of your compassion, and the extent of my misjudgment,” Yusuke says. “You’ve held my attention for quite some time.”

“What, for real?”

“Of course. Is that really so surprising?”

“Well, yeah,” Ryuji says. “For the longest time I thought I wasn’t even on your radar.”

“My... radar?”

“I mean, you never seemed interested in anyone who came onto you, so I figured your standards were way too high for me to hit.”

It’s a statement delivered without much self-deprecation, one that has definitively been proven false given their current intimacy, but… there are a multitude of dimensions to it that warrant a response. Surely Ryuji realizes at this point that Yusuke’s precedent of disinterest had less to do with appearance or personality, and more to do with investment; a beautiful stranger can elicit aesthetic interest, of course, but can only do so much to move his heart in the way Ryuji does so effortlessly.

In any case, even with his limited personal experience with regards to romance, Yusuke knows such an admission from a significant other simply cannot go unchallenged. He takes one of Ryuji’s hands in his own, and brings it to his lips.

“My standards are quite high,” he says. “I’ll settle for none other than you, Ryuji.”

The gesture’s received quite well— Ryuji groans, burying his face in the crook of Yusuke’s neck, though it does little to hide the charming flush overtaking his features. “You sap,” he mumbles, barely intelligible. Then, “Love you too, dude.”

**Author's Note:**

> I have a lot of thoughts abt reading yusuke as gay, ace, & p... demi? probably? definitely doesn't experience romo feelings the """""""standard""""""" way


End file.
